There’s a quiet thing that happens as you gain experience. You start getting ignored in conversations. Not because you don’t know the topic. Sometimes it’s because you do. I see it when people talk about college. They’ll trade opinions they’ve heard. I’ll ask, “What are you actually hoping college does for them?” The room moves on. Same with careers. Someone wants the next role. I’ll ask, “What are you trying to optimize for?” Or suggest talking to people instead of spraying applications. The conversation shuts down. This happens even in rooms full of smart, senior, well-paid people. And honestly, it can feel bad. You feel left out. It feels dismissive. Like your experience is inconvenient. What I’ve learned is this: Once you stop reinforcing the system and start questioning it, you no longer help people feel comfortable. Most conversations aren’t about finding the best answer. They’re about validating the path already chosen. So when you ask “why,” you’re not being difficult. You’re adding friction. That’s the part no one prepares you for. Growth can cost you social ease. Clarity can cost you attention. If you’ve felt sidelined after asking reasonable questions, you’re not broken. You’re just no longer playing the role the room expects. The right conversations still exist. They’re just fewer, smaller, and more intentional. And once you see that, you stop chasing the wrong rooms.